Perspective

Theology is a beautiful art.  Its the art of describing to someone the way that you view God.  Its interesting because the very nature of it is so subjective.  Its impossible to truly know what God is like completely (if we're being honest with ourselves).  The best we can do is paint a picture of the God that we worship.  Its interesting because when I think of God, I begin to think of God's boundless mercy and love for the oppressed.  I also think about God's heart for the fatherless.  I think about God's love for his children that suffer.  So you put all these things together and the picture is of a God who is deeply motivated by social justice and love for the broken.  If you talk to Elisa, you'll hear her talk about God's spirit moving in the church.  If you talk to a worship leader you'll hear about worship.  If you talk to a Calvinist you'll hear about God's glory.  Sometimes two people describe the God of the Bible and the image you see described is completely different. The reason why people have such variance is because they are looking at a closeup of his arm and thinking they're describing his wholeness. I don't think this is a bad thing.

I believe that people are inherently shaped by their experiences with God and their surroundings to the point where no two people can see God the same way (we are individuals after all).  God is going to look different from the eyes of a leper dying in the streets of India than from the eyes of a pastor from a mega church.  Is one person's perspective better?  Sometimes.  But mostly... I believe that we are all given a glimpse of the Glory of who God is. We are granted a piece of the grandeur that is our God.  No one person is capable of seeing the fullness of who God is, so we describe the portion that God has put in front of us.

I can relate to this aspect of God's character because I have 2 kids.  Ella is one and Lily is 2.  Their ages are different, but so are their personalities.  I know what Lily is like and I know what Ella is like.  I treat them differently because I love them.  I also treat them differently because they are different people.  I know that Lily is competitive, so I treat her like she's competitive.  Ella is a sweety, so I treat her like she's a sweety.  My girls both know me a little differently because of who they are, and what they need.  This is the way that God is.

There is so much depth to who God is that he shows us just the right parts of him to let us know him more.   The piece of God we see is so special because we're the only one who is revealed that one special piece of him. It is such an intimate experience, to know that God is showing you that one piece of him that no one else knows.  The perspective we have on God is critical and in all reality its the perspective that we have on him that shows us that God loves us deeply and individually.

(This was never finished, but I thought it would be worth having available and when I can I'll finish it up)

I found myself reading the book of Jonah the other day.  Its not unusual for something to stand out to me about a book, or a passage, but this one really shook me.

For those unfamiliar with the story of Jonah I'll present a short re-cap.  Essentially, God speaks to his prophet (Jonah) and tells him that he needs to go to this nasty awful city called Nineveh and declare that Yahweh was in charge and would bring calamity on them if they didn't repent.  Jonah HATED Niveveh and the people who lived there.  So instead of following God's directions he ended up on a boat heading the exact opposite direction.  A few days into the voyage a crazy storm ended up hitting the ship and all the sailors got scared.  Jonah ended up telling them he was running away from God and jumped into the ocean where he was eaten by a "Great Fish".  He sat there three days before the fish threw him up right at the doorstep of Nineveh.  So Jonah did what any child would do if his parents asked him to do a task.  He half-asses it.  He runs through the town and in the quietest voice he could (that part may not be true, but its how I imagine it.) proclaimed that Nineveh would be destroyed if they didn't repent.  He then went to the top of a hill to watch the city burn.  When it didn't go up in flames he said this to God,

"O LORD, is this not what I said when I was still at home? That is why I was so quick to flee to Tarshish. I knew that you are a gracious and compassionate God, slow to anger and abounding in love, a God who relents from sending calamity.Now, O LORD, take away my life, for it is better for me to die than to live"

The Pizza Place

About four years ago, I had the distinct honor of having one of my oldest and best friends visit me at my brand new school. It was such an exciting thing for me to have my friend meet all my new school friends. To celebrate his coming we all decided to go to pizza together. I for whatever reason had to run a few errands first so we decided for us to meet up with my new friends at the pizza place. To my delight, when we arrived, there were two seats already prepared for us. The only disappointing thing was that it was at an adjacent table to the one all my new friends were at. We were close enough for conversation, however as the night developed we found more and more that we were not only at our own table but in our own separate group. We ended up spending over an hour at the pizza place only to feel entirely ignored by my new friends. It was one of the most awkward and humiliating things I can imagine having happened.

What strikes me as strange in this is that I see this happen in the Church. We as Christians are called to invite people to a grand celebration, a feast, and too often seeing “sinners” or “those who've fallen from the fold” makes us uncomfortable so even though they are sitting in the seat next to us we don't give them the dignity to share a meal with them. Physically they're there, but we ignore their presence.

This happened to my oldest friend, as he began making bad decisions in his personal life, the church he attended and had invested so much of his life into had totally forsaken him. He was ignored and ostracized because of his life choices. He should've been the one we invited all the more eagerly to this amazing banquet. He knew the food was delicious, but the company was attrocious. How can we all be better dinner guests?

In Control

Its easy to forget that God is ultimately in control of everything. People let you down, finances are tight, car breaks down, life throws you a curve and that old familiar voice starts whispering his lies. Man you could never find a job, this car is done for, you can't handle this. When things start to feel chaotic the first thing I let go of is the all comforting sense that God has it in his hands.
I wonder how Joseph felt. His own family, whom he trusted enough to tell his dreams to, sold him into slavery, he was accused of rape, and was then thrown into prison. And I try to figure out where God is when my truck breaks down! His whole life changed and seemingly was taken from him. Thats the funny thing about God though is that in order for him to show us just how in control he is there is sometimes this whole journey of seeing things look out of our own control. If Joseph had never been sold into slavery things would've been easier for him for a while, but then a famine would sweep the land and he and his family would starve to death. Instead God brought him to the center of a heartless Egyptian empire and there brought him into a position of authority so that God would not only deliver Joseph and his family but also the entire nation.
God has whats best for us. Just because we're in some rotten stinking jail for a crime we didn't commit doesn't mean that God has left us. He is in control, and who knows maybe somehow one day we'll see that we didn't get that job, or a promotion or our cars broke down in order to shape how an entire nation would have to rely on him alone. Never forget: GOD IS IN CONTROL.

The Wedding Feast

Jesus loves his bride. When we look at the church as his bride we begin to see things differently, we see men and women being prepared for their wedding day. It will take a lot to turn our adulterous hearts into a worthy bride, but as we seek him we are purified. We, as his bride, worship in adoration of our coming groom. We await expectantly for the strength and love found in his arms alone. We long for the day we can embrace our lover in the security of our union to be made one by our covenant. The church is the first fruit of his redeemed creation. She is clean lovely redeemed and beautiful. Her past has been washed away and her heart belongs to Jesus. He loves her blemishes. He doesn't mind seeing her with no makeup. He still loves her just the same. He loves her bad habits. He even loves her inconsistent love for him. He loves that she's cranky in the morning. He loves her bad breath. He loves her hairy legs. To him see is beautiful!

A Memoire from Judas

I've begun to realize that the part of the passion narrative that resonates most with me isn't the fact that Jesus came to save our souls, or that God sent his son. For me what resonates is that when the mob yells "Crucify him" I can hear among them my very own voice. What's even worse is that mine is the loudest. I can hear my voice above the entire uprising of people condemning him to death.

"My sin yells 'Crucify' louder than the mob that day.
My sin yells 'Crucify' louder than any mouth!"

"The price of atonement is more than i've found to offer up as my plea,
Jesus my heart is all i have to give to you, so weak and so unworthy,
this simply will not do,for your body that was broken, how can this be enough?
by me you were abandoned, by me you were betrayed,
yet in your arms and in your heart forever i have stayed"


"Behold the Man upon a cross,
My sin upon His shoulders
Ashamed I hear my mocing voice,
Call out among the scoffers
It was my sin that helf Him there
Until it was accomplished
His dying breath has brought me life
I know that it is finished"

I often think of how much I hate injustice in this world, I know that God is a God of judgment because he needs to bring the world back to him. I still can't help but feel as if what I hate in injustice is the very things that I house in my very own heart. This is a sobering thought. How do I deal with the depravity within my heart?

You Lift Me Up

You lift me up
Your love never ceases

I am falling apart
My fragile heart breaks
Because with my foolish hands
I have pushed you away

You lift me up
Your love never ceases

When I carry the world
All on top of my back
The weight of it all
Pushes me down

You lift me up
Your love never ceases

When your freedom reigns
I have been set free
In your love arms
I place my life

You lift me up
Your love never ceases

The Promised Land

Moses was a Hebrew superhero. If you were a good Jewish kid, growing up you wouldn't have action figures of Batman or Spiderman instead you'd have your talking, action pose Moses! He was the hero of his people for leading them from captivity in Egypt to freedom in the Sinai Desert. It sounds like a bum deal, but it wasn't, for the first time in years, the Hebrews were finally able to experience true freedom. These people had been promised a land, and it was Moses who was supposed to lead them out from Egypt into this Promised Land. However, as you read Exodus, you find out that the people are really stubborn, and aren't interested in following God. What happens, he decides to let the entire generation die before he leads them into their inheritance. Among this generation, of course is Moses.
In the final chapter of Deuteronomy, the final book written by Moses, it details this anticlimactic story of God taking Moses up on Mt. Nebo, and showing him all of the Promised Land. When he gets done showing Moses the land, I can almost imagine Moses asking God, "It's so beautiful... When do we go?" And God having to tell him, "well that's just the thing... you won't be going there." Moses dies on Mt. Nebo presumably looking out over the Promised Land.
But that isn't the end of the story...
Fast forward close to two thousand years and you have some crazy rabbi from Gallilee walking around The Promised Land teaching people according to the Law of Moses. He's teaching them about resurrection, some kingdom of God, he's even stirring up trouble with the guys who are meant to be upholding the righteous Law of Moses. He even claims to be the very son of God, teaching that faith in him brings salvation. He takes a few of his closest buddies up on a tall mountain in the Promised Land and the craziest thing happens... The rabbi turns bright white and out of two clouds appear two different super heroes, Elijah and Moses, not the one with movable arms and voice activated action poses, but the real one... the one from two thousand years before. The guys following their rabbi ask him if they should build a tabernacle for them, but before the can even get the who question out they hear like thunder shaking the sky, "THIS IS MY SON; WITH WHOM I AM WELL PLEASED. LISTEN TO HIM!" They look up and only their rabbi was there. It's easy to wonder what these disciples are thinking, but what about Moses? He is standing face to face with the very Son of God having a conversation, then next thing Moses knows he's gone. I often find myself wondering if he realized that the Promised Land he was told he'd never enter into was exactly where he was standing. I like to imagine that after this scenario plays itself out that Elijah looks at Moses and says, the Promised Land is something else huh? Only for Moses to come back with something like, "THAT WAS THE PROMISED LAND? I was so focused on Jesus I missed the very same Promised Land I spent my life trying to get to."
When Moses died he had no doubt that he'd never see the Promised Land and yet God's faithfulness to Moses brought him back from the dead in the middle of the promised land... to see his Messiah or annointed one. Not only did God show himself faithful with the land, but also with showing him the man who would change history. It is a beautiful thing.

Irresistible

I started reading my favorite book, Irresistible Revolution, again, and frankly I find it Irresistible. It has started reminding me so much of the things that I've been excited about. Its shown me the passion and fire that I feel like I've to a large degree lost. I used to be so excited to serve the world, to humble myself to see someone lifted out of the muck of this life, yet somehow this flame I once had, has largely burnt out. Yet while I read the words of passion that Claiborn writes, I can't help but remember the time when I decided to be homeless, when I took to the streets for no other reason than that Christ needs to be represented in the dark places. So much of the comfort of my life has strangled my passion, but I think its time I go back to my roots. Jeff Hubbard once told me that I was a selfless revolutionary, and until I once again fill that title I will not rest. I want to be an ordinary radical who frequently lays my life down for the benefit of others, and takes up my cross and becomes a mockery for the beautiful and glorious name of Jesus Christ. I want to once again look upon the injustice in this world and be completely broken by it. I want to become nauseated when I hear of the depravity of the world I live in. I no longer want to carry complacency and comfort, I nail it to the cross and from here on out I will carry the cross of knowing that people out there hurt, and that it is my duty to help them.

The Body of Christ

I have to confess that sometimes it is so discouraging to deal with community. Recently a debate erupted here on campus as to whether or not pennies sticking to a wall was because of the Holy Spirit or if it was because of science. It was being handled in such a damaging way. Some people would post about the natural science laws, while others would respond in outrage to their lack of faith. In the long run, it didn't matter who was right. The body was destroying itself. Tooth and nail we were ripping each other apart. I have so much confidence in the body of Christ, I know we can do all things through the authority of Christ, but we need to unite. We need to overcome our differences and accept that they exist, yet rally around the things we have in common.

it is so that my transgressions have born a withered fruit,
the sun has scorched the rising plants;
alas they have no root, the bleached bones of animals bound by leather strips,
dance through the air with laughter as i wield this wicked whip,
as you did warn me carpenter, this world has weakened my heart,
so easily i disparage, self-seeking the work of my heart,
and there you have come to me at the moment I bathe in my sorrow,
so in love with myself, sought after avoiding tomorrow,
where do you find the love to offer he who betrays you?
and offer to wash my feet as i offer to disobey you,
your beauty does bereave me, and how my words do fail,
so faithfully and dutifully I award you with betrayal,
the weak and the down trodden fall on broken legs,
as i walk past a smile i cast, fervor in my stead,
but my bones like plastic, do buckle backward now,
I lay in this field by Judas' bowels and anticipate the plow,
I can not be forgiven; my wages will be paid,
for those more lovely and admirable is least among the saved,
and where would I fit Jesus?
what place is left for me?
the price of atonement is more than I've found to offer up as my plea,
Jesus my heart is all I have to give to you, so weak and so unworthy,
this simply will not do, no alabaster jar, no diamond in the rough,
for your body that was broken, how can this be enough?
by me you were abandoned, by me you were betrayed,
yet in your arms and in your heart forever i have stayed

Your glory illuminates my life, and no darkness will descend,
for you have loved me forever, and your love will never end

Forgiveness

"Though your sins are like scarlet,
they shall be as white as snow;
though they are red as crimson,
they shall be like wool"
- Isaiah 1:18

"The Lord our God is merciful and forgiving,
even though we have rebelled against him"
-Daniel 9:9

"As far as the east is from the west,
so far has he removed our transgressions from us."
-Psalm 103:12

"I, even I, am he who blots out
your transgressions, for my own sake,
and remembers your sins no more."
-Isaiah 43:25

I Am Forgiven

Fellowship

Last month was my 21st birthday. I thought it would be fun to have a big dinner thing at a pizza place. Elisa made reservations, I invited everyone I knew. The big day came, I arrived 15 minutes late to find a completely empty pizza hall. I don't know I've ever been so bummed out. No one was coming to my birthday. However, my sorrow quickly turned to joy as almost like clockwork people started pouring in. People began filing in one after another until almost the entire party room was full! There were a good 20 people in there to celebrate with me. To top it off I was surprised by a dear friend of mine from Paradise who had come up just for the night to be there for my birthday. I felt so special. No one had ever taken the time to make sure I had a birthday to remember. (Thanks Elisa!)
Towards the end of the night, I started getting tired from all the amazing pizza I had eaten. I was sitting in a corner digesting, just sort of enjoying the moment, when it dawned on me. I wasn't personally engaging anyone at the time, but it brought me so much pleasure to know that everyone in that room had gathered because they wanted to be with me. It was incredible. 20 people who loved me all coming together for no other reason than to love the fact that I was born.
I think this is very much how God is. When we gather in fellowship, we may not mention his name, or our relationship with him, yet there is something so powerful about believers coming together simply to exist in the presence of their savior. God delights in it. He sees his children coming together just to eat and celebrate, and his heart lightens. His face fills with joy, and his laugh begins to shake the universe.

The Name

In the Bible times, the Hebrew people would name their kids based on either something God had done for them, or a characteristic of that kid. For instance, names such as Rafael. Rafa means healing, while El is a contraction of the word Elohim meaning God. So Rafael means "God is the healer". Or with Esau in Genesis, he was born very red and hairy, so his parents called him Esau or "Red Guy". Likewise, Malachi comes from the Hebrew word Malak which means messenger, and ai which would translate as my. Malachi at birth was proclaimed to be "My Messenger." The Hebrews had an understanding that their name was everything. That by the very nature of their name, you would be able to tell so much about a person. Your name was all important in the Hebrew society. Isaiah does something interesting when he writes, he names his kids based on what would come to happen in Israel. Even in the New Testament we see predictions about a person based on how they are named. Mary and Joseph were commanded to name their son, who would be born miraculously from a couple who had never consummated their marriage, Jesus. In Hebrew his name is Yehu-Shua. Yehu being a shortening of the divine name YHWH and Shua meaning salvation. Jesus' name was Joshua or the "Lord is My Salvation". It even says in Matthew 1:21 that "She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins." Was there ever a more powerful name attached to person? The very name of Jesus proclaimed that God's salvation was present. The very core of his person was the salvation that God has to offer his broken creation. It is no wonder that his name is the Name above all names.

Life Is Good

I was realizing, that a lot of my recent blogs have been almost exclusively about how terrible life has been. Granted, this semester has sucked, there is still so much good in my life. Honestly, I feel as if I'm such a blessed man. I have been given some of the best friends in the world, like Nolan. Every time either of us feel down, we have some of the best guy time in the world. Or Jeef! even though he lives across the state, we're just as much roommates now as when we actually lived together. If having two of the best friends in the world isn't enough, I also have an absolutely gorgeous girlfriend who loves the crap out of me all the time. I've never felt more loved and honored than when I'm around her. Even when I do dumb things, she is so understanding and treats me with such respect. I've never felt more valued in my life.
If all that isn't enough, I have a God and Savior whose love for me is new every day and even though I don't feel super close to him, his presence in my life overwhelms me. It is a beautiful thing to look at where I've come from and be able to realize how much God has saved me from. He has really rocked my face in recently with how much he loves me.

I am truly blessed.

Global Economics

There was a day not too long ago, when I was walking and a nice young woman asked me if I'd like to try a free sample of milk. I, of course, said yes. I drank my milk and started to ask the woman what she was doing. She told me about how a prominent milk company pays her to promote their product. After some time, she told me that if I'd like I could take as much milk as I want. So I did, I took about 8 crates full of milk. In my mind, I had this beautiful vision of sharing my milk with everyone in my dorm, so I put it in the floor refrigerator so people could have equal access to it. I went about the rest of my day as normal and that night I decided I'd like some milk, so I went to the fridge only to find out that all the milk had been taken. I didn't understand how in only a few hours a fridge full of milk could be completely empty. I ended up discovering that the few privledged in the dorm who had mini fridges would go in and take as much milk as their fridges could hold. Of course those who had the means of storing it would take more than they needed when there was enough milk in that fridge for everyone in the whole dorm. On the same note, there are plenty of resources in the whole world for everyone to have their needs met. America alone grows almost enough food to feed Africa. I mourn for us as a people. I mourn the fact that we are so selfish that it is ok for us as a nation to be so grossly overfed while there are still people out there starving. Where is the justice?

Humanity

Sometimes it's easy to think that as humans we've evolved in a sense. Looking at the advances in technology, political theory, relief work, and even the way humans interact. Take for instance the way the world responded to the crisis in Haiti. A 7.5 earthquake devastates the country, and the whole world comes to the rescue. But if things are progressively getting better, then how do we account for the pain that comes at the hands of other human beings? In Uganda, there are men kidnapping children to have them fight a bloody horrible war. Or in Burma, the National Army could literally go from village to village seeking out ethnic minorities in order to cleanse the national population. What about the men in Amsterdam who kidnap women and sell them into the sex trade to fill their wallets? How can humanity being progressing towards a grand Utopia if we are still so capable of causing so much pain on other human beings? It seems so obvious to me that Humanity itself is hopeless. Stuck here with no hope. Even nature seems to be taking part in the onslaught. It's so difficult to see God in the midst of such despair. Where can he possibly be when the very ones who glorify his names are the ones buried underneath 8 feet of rubble from a tsunami? Where is God in bloated black stomachs? Where is he when a woman's body is treated like a commodity to buy and sell?

The Cleansing

A man with leprosy came to him and begged him on his knees, "If you are willing, you can make me clean." Filled with compassion, Jesus reached out his hand and touched the man. "I am willing," he said. "Be clean!" Immediately the leprosy left him and he was cured. Mark 1:40-42.

Reading this, I begin to see and feel the compassion of my savior. By Jewish understanding, to worship Yahweh, one would enter into the Temple, and bring your sacrifice to the Lord. In Jewish law, it was a sin to enter into the temple if you were unclean. In that same law a person would be declared unclean by a number of things: Handling dead bodies; giving birth; having sex; or even touching a person who was unclean. Jesus reached out and touched an unclean leper. He Touched Him!! Unclean. Jesus cared so much about this man being restored into relationship with God he was willing to be made unclean to allow this man to worship. God's cleansing into his life. The leper for the first time in his life would be able to enter into the temple. He would finally be able to worship the way he'd longed to his whole life. His infirmities would no longer hold power over him. From now on this man would be a product of Jesus' restoring power. Christ would take on that uncleanliness so this man would be able to worship.

Ultimately that is what Christ offers. He lays down his position of authority and power, making a way for every man to be able to have what was lost that day in the Garden. Relationship. Christ embraced the uncleanliness of a leper and is more than willing to embrace the uncleanliness of every one of his followers in order to let them stand without blame before his father.

The Church

Tonight I had the distinct pleasure of being able to be a table host at a church-wide Christmas dinner. It was an outreach event geared towards the lonely and poor in the Paradise community, and I got to be the face of Jesus to whoever would sit at my table. With my passion for poverty, I had hoped to get a table filled with druggies and homeless, but as it usually happens in Paradise, my table was mostly elderly people. 2 of them had just had their 70th marriage anniversary, another was just a lonely old man, and the last was a elderly Mormon whose wife was in the hospital and didn't want to spend Christmas alone. But the thing that really caught my attention tonight was the table next to me. Sitting next to a bunch of elderly ladies was a lady obviously strung out on meth. Her hair was dreaded from neglect and she was wearing an Orlando Magic jacket from the 90's that couldn't have been washed since then. I began hurting inside to talk to her, I figured at this church people aren't used to poverty, so a woman like this would scare our little old grandmothers. I could not have been more wrong. I got to see over the course of the night these older ladies share their food and their lives with this woman. They didn't care that she smelled, or that she could barely speak in intelligent sentences, all that mattered to these ladies was that this lady was here and she needed some lovin'. It put such a smile on my face to see as she left each one of the ladies get up and give the homeless woman a hug, I knew they actually cared for her. I feel as if so often I don't give the body of Christ a chance, I tend to think of everyone as another consumer. Another person just trying to get their fix of religion, but tonight I got to see some little conservative old women be The Church.

Hunger riots in Haiti
Click
A shooting today in South-Central LA
Click
This young girl lost her family to AIDS left to fend for herself and her two brothers
Click
Tsunami kills thousands
Click
For a mere 30 cents a day you could send a girl like Rosa to school
Click
Race riots wreck downtown Detroit
....
I guess there's nothing good on TV